“It's just too big. You want to fight it, but it feels like there's no point. What's the point!? It's all so incredibly tiring. It's complete helplessness”
“Of course, I was very sad. But I had the most difficulties with the emptiness. There was no emotion at all. Nothing.”
“It felt like a complete haze. I wasn’t in the now. I wasn’t there anymore at all”
“Most of the time, I tried to contain my thoughts and feelings. they stay inside and I managed to repress them. But sometimes there were streaks where everything came tumbling out all at once.”
“I was always looking for something to be worried about, even when there was nothing wrong. I tried to stop obsessing so much, but when I couldn’t I felt even worse. Because how could I do anything if I couldn’t even stop my own mind”
“It feels like you are in a dream. Like you are slowly losing yourself.”
“I had all kinds of thoughts and feelings, all the time. They were consuming me. There were times where I felt like I couldn’t breathe. Like the air wasn’t entering my lungs anymore. I couldn’t breathe, I couldn’t speak, I couldn’t cry. I couldn’t do anything.”